I need to remind myself to walk away. To stay away. To be away from all that there is.
Unfortunately as much as I have tried over the few years to be alone, to live for myself and only myself, I find that I’ve become to really hate being alone. I hate playing gooseberry even if I joke about it as if it’s my job. I hate it when people always talk about how they know something about other people more than I do. And I have come to crave company so much I’ve lost sight of what I’ve become.
It’s tiring to even try nowadays. People don’t really care why I wanna go overseas for a month to a country where I can’t even speak their language. They think it’s always fangirling. Or some other superficial thing. Thanks friends. I’m too tired to explain, so really, go ahead and make all the assumptions you want. Because you’ll always think it’s the way I am.
Right now, let’s not feel anything.
Don’t really wna feel anything for the rest of my life..