Set fire to the skies

Set fire to the skies

This is a lousy shot lol I have more experience with Janson’s Sony NEX-5. Lost a bunch of photos coz I forgot to format my SD card before using it to take photos 😦

At least it’s still my lovely magic hour.

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Set fire to the skies

This is a lousy shot lol I have more experience with Janson’s Sony NEX-5. Lost a bunch of photos coz I forgot to format my SD card before using it to take photos 😦

At least it’s still my lovely magic hour.

Nearly halfway through

It’s March Holidays.. and I work in a school. Of course it’s my week off. Been nua-ing at home (like sleep at 3/4/5am wake up at 11/12/1/2/3pm kind), watching Sungkyunkwan Scandal (after skipping Poseidon and Secret Garden and cursing to MBC on why they delay my Moon/Sun finale episodes).. it’s been a nice time off, since I didn’t have to wake up early, travel so much and come back home feeling tired and all. Thankful for the week off.

And on another note, my boss happily allowed me to go Japan with D. Hahaha.

On another note, procrastination is a devil. Just finished booking accommodation with D in Japan today at long last, amounts up to about S$450 so I guess that’s fine.. hope we won’t be so unfortunate as to book a 黑店 lol. Expenditure is crazy, currently at S$1.1k, excluding transportation, food and shopping. End of the day probably gonna amount to $3k+. Kinda expected it for Japan, but aigoo..

Anyway the point is, we’re nearly halfway through. It’s been about 3.5 months since my last A Level paper on 1 December 2011. Cheehoe recently reminded me on his birthday to spend the remaining 4.5 months doing what I wanted to do that I could never have done before in a busy school term. I shall just list the few that I actually remember lol (since I upgraded to an iPhone 4S and didn’t manage to back up some old notes):

  1. Learn a new language: Korean, French, Japanese, Spanish
  2. Learn driving
  3. Vacation in Seoul
  4. Backpacking in Aussie
  5. Buy a DSLR
  6. Explore Singapore
  7. Catch up on dramas
  8. Find what I wanted to do in life
  9. Pack room
  10. Read unread books
  11. Find Christ again

Well..

1. Learn a new language: Korean, French, Japanese, Spanish

I am learning Korean, at a proper class with a proper teacher. Well.. not a very good language class since the teacher really isn’t an effective bilingual (in Korean and English, not that her Chinese is very good either).. at least my couple of months of self-exploration on the Korean language has prepped me well for learning this! But it gets kinda boring..

Going to Japan means having to pick up essential words too.. I feel so foreign from Japanese that I think I will simply speak Korean in the face of native Japanese. LOL.

2. Learn driving

I passed BTT.. well. Still very much repel driving. Maybe I’ll start soon.. after I come back from Japan? Sounds good.

3. Vacation in Seoul

Got completely hooked on K-Pop since August 2011, and I really enjoy Seoul culture and all.. so I really wanted to go. Planning to save this vacation up and go on a longer student exchange instead. Hahaha.

4. Backpacking in Aussie

When I’m older, when I feel like I don’t owe the world anything any more, I will.

5. Buy a DSLR

Fingers crossed, hopefully I’ll get one tomorrow. LOL.

#update: I JUST GOT IT LOL.

6. Explore Singapore

By this I meant go to the Zoo, go to free museums, walk around town etc and actually know and command Singapore’s culture to heart

7. Catch up on dramas

I most certainly did.. though I’m lagging behind in many shows (other than Grey’s)

8. Find what I wanted to do in life

This is a certain.. but not really certain. I finally switched away from Sociology to Psychology, and I’m pretty certain I wanna head in this direction, and I’m praying that this is the right one for me.

9.  Pack room

Packed, need to pack again.

10. Read unread books

Gotta start! Bought like 7 new books but haven’t read a single one. Need to start shelf my Korean book (by Ban Ki Moon, can’t read it yet for nuts..) and dig out my 10+ unread Picoult books. And my awesome possum psychology books 😀

11. Find Christ again

I think more importantly than this, it’s to find the relationship and make it everlasting.. tough journey so far.

Gotta meet up with friends.. Jia Hui, Glada.. you know. To chill, not to talk about work and stuff. Been drowning in work and worrying about money issues for the past 1.5 months. Crazy.

On a side note, been tasked to write up on why I went back to DHS after taking Os.. lol. Looking back on the then entirely irrational side of Yi Xi.. crazy. Crazy times.

I Love You

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Giggling to my phone on the train #likearetard hahaha. Suddenly wondered when the first time I said ‘I love you’ was. It shouldn’t be wrong: Primary 1, on an email, to a boy in class I really liked, coz Y was so sweet and all.. Hahaha.

And then he left for another school:(

Then W walked into my life. We were close.. But never close enough. I was so sad that he got rejected by DHS (because there was no boys’ table tennis, the heck). I didn’t tell him anything though.

But of course I’ve never said it to anybody in spoken words before. One day, maybe, to my soulmate (perhaps non-existent). Oh well.

Haven’t spoken love for a while though. Been very very busy trapped in my own fake dilemmas and drowning in lies I’ve been feeding myself for 6 years. Watching endless romantic dramas, the sickest (I mean like the sweetest and craziest) love songs, strange but awesome love stories.. I wonder when I would be able to finally open up.

Until then, I would like to think that love is fluorescent in colour. That even if the person I love is standing in a crowd, he would always stand out ^_^

Siglap Sec.

Work at Siglap Sec is starting to make me miss Ngee Ann a lot..

Need to think long and hard if I’m gonna stay for a long time. Marking is tough for most except for summaries, and it’s challenging my knowledge of English. I’m most afraid of writing model essays, because I’ve never been able to score high in O Level English. Plus Pasir Ris is super far for me.

Honestly I would gladly take up if a vacancy in TKSS opened up..

Teaching is interesting, but I don’t think I’m cut out for it. I prefer to watch people – their interactions and behaviours. It’s almost as if 4 years of doing that have taught me to predict their next response. Maybe that’s why I’d do well in Psychology.

Then again.. Lol.

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BB is back:)

The Big U

No, not the U as in “Unsatisfactory” in grades, but U as in “University”, at long last.

Hahaha the Big As finally dropped the bomb on everyone on Friday. Crazy crazy.

Of course I would cry for Chemistry.. when you put your heart, your soul and your kaching into a field of study you are so amazed from deep within by it nearly killed me when I saw B.

Of course I would cry when I knew I couldn’t go overseas.. when you’re blessed with parents who unfortunately (or fortunately) aren’t the GIC President or a super Litigator and can’t afford to let you go overseas even if you are capable of it it would have killed me when I saw that my grades went way above expectations.

Of course I would cry when I finally prayed and understood that God gave me my parents, that by God’s Grace I will not complain, that by God’s Grace I am already so so fortunate to be in Singapore, that by God’s Grace I am so so thankful for taking me through the Big As even if I felt as if I might as not have studied hard at all.

That by God’s Grace I am more than just unworthy of Your love, but You love me nonetheless.

감사합니다, 주님.

주님 내가 여기있사오니

주님 내가 여기 있사오니 나를 보내소서
나의 맘 나의 몸 주께 드리오니 주 받으옵소서
주님 내가 여기 있사오니 나를 써주소서 
가진 것 모두 다 주께 드리오니 주 받으옵소서
알렐루야 알렐루야 알렐루야 알렐루야
알렐루야 알렐루야 알렐루야 알렐루야

: )

Keep moving forward.

We wish for many things in life; some for good things, some for better things, some for the best. I wished for these things too. I ate good food, read good books and wore good clothes. I studied and got better grades, persevered and got better results.

It’s always nice to wish for good things, better if you work for them and best that you know which to value. What I value most are the best in my life, my loved ones, without whom I would not be who I am now. It’s because of them that I am the best (내가 제일 잘 나가!)

We only get to live once, but if we do it right, once is enough. Because in the end, it’s not the years in our life that count but the life in our years. The past 18 years and 11 months I have gone through life as a comet would, fleeting but brilliant. And I don’t regret a minute of it.

I don’t know where life would lead us from here and how to take the next step but I believe dear Albert Einstein was a genius when he said that “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”

I already consider my life a miracle.